04 Nov 2017

Isn’t Couchsurfing Dangerous For Women?

Tips for women on how to Couchsurf safely as a woman.

This is Part 8 of the 8-part Beginner’s Guide to Couchsurfing:

1. Introduction to the Guide
2. What Couchsurfing Is & How it Works
3. Getting Started and What Hosts Want
4. How to Write a Great Couchsurfing Profile
5. Examples: What Not To Do in Couchsurfing Requests
6. How to Write a Great Couchsurfing Request
7. How to Make Sure Your Couchsurfing Experience is 100% Safe
8. Isn’t Couchsurfing Dangerous For Women?

Is Couchsurfing Dangerous for Women?

TLDR: Yes and no.

As a bit of background, I’m a solo female backpacker who, as of July 2017, has traveled to 26 countries and Couchsurfed 31 times, hosting guests 10 times and surfing 21 times. So suffice to say, I have a good deal of experience.

The first thing I’ll point out is that there is no such thing as a 100% safe Couchsurfing experience. I’d argue there’s no such thing as a 100% safe travel experience, either. These things can always carry a small inherent danger that prevents someone from guaranteeing 100% safety. But you can get pretty darn close with the tips below.

1. Only stay with female hosts (with good reviews)

I personally surf with both men and women but this is a great option for beginner female Couchsurfers who are very uneasy about the idea of staying with a male host. Naturally you’ll have way less options, but it’s a good way to dip one’s toe into the community to see what it’s like. However, note that it’s significantly more difficult to find a female host since most Couchsurfers do tend to be male, so you may have to put in more effort in the messaging process to find a female host.

If you’re open-minded to staying with a male host, I’d recommend doing so — if you follow the tips below, it’s just as possible to find a super safe male host.

2. Only stay with people with a large number of reviews

Additionally, don’t interact, stay with, or host people who have 0 references or seem off in some way. Every person on the platform has a reference section which details what staying with them is like. It’s just like a Yelp or Airbnb review. As a solo surfer, stay away from people who don’t have reviews – while they’re likely great people, they could also be more sinister, and since you cannot differentiate which of the two they are, don’t stay with them or meet up in person.

How many is ‘large’? This depends on how trusting you are of the community, really. I’d say the following is a good outline:

  • Very Relaxed Safety Standards: 10-15 reviews
  • Average Safety Standards: : 15-30 reviews
  • Strict Safety Standards: : 30+ reviews

When I surf, I generally will stay with people with 12+ reviews – if they’re in the 12-22 range of reviews, I’ll be sure to analyze the references and make sure they’re above-and-beyond.

Generally, speaking, if they have 30+ positive reviews, they’re very, very likely to be fantastic hosts. It still helps to take some of the precautions listed below, especially if you’re new to Couchsurfing.

Also, if someone seems ‘off’ when messaging you, err on the side of caution and find another host. One of my to-be hosts with about ~7 reviews once messaged me with a ‘Hi ;)’; of course, it could have been well-meaning but I didn’t want to take the chance – I quickly arranged another option and didn’t stay with the host.

If I’m still not sure if it’s safe, I’ll do some of the things outlined below.

3. If someone offer to host you (instead of you sending them a request), be extra sure they have a large number of great reviews

I’m always very suspicious of people who offer to host me and I don’t think I’ve ever actually accepted one, and if I have, it’s only because they have 30 or 40+ reviews. If they offer to host me, usually I’d need 30-40+ reviews to feel comfortable staying with them.

4. Contact women who have stayed with the host before

Again, to double check the safety of a host, especially if you’re very uneasy about surfing with a male host, you can message women who have stayed at the potential host’s place and ask them if they felt safe and what the host is like.

To do this:

  • Navigate to the host’s ‘References’ page and click on the profiles of those who have stayed with him/her before.
  • Send them a message asking about their experience with the host and if they felt safe. Make sure to do this with 5-7 hosts if possible (or as many as you can in case some don’t respond).

This has been incredibly helpful for me in the past, with screenshots of what I’ve sent as an example below. If any one of them report anything ‘off’, don’t take the risk and find another host.

5. Analyze the references carefully

Good hosts usually have a large number of rave reviews referring to the host as super great and generous. If a number of reviews have more neutral tones or mention things that seem ‘off’, it’s better to dig deeper by contacting previous surfers.

In Conclusion: Is it safe?

If you follow the guidelines above, yes.

Of my 31 Couchsurfing experiences, all have been positive ones. The closest I’ve come to in terms of trouble were 2 guys who subtly hit on me; when I made a point of declining, they totally honored it and both experiences were entirely positive.

My good experiences on Couchsurfing.com have been purely because of the precautions I took above; a number of travelers who don’t take these precautions naturally will have bad experiences.

In other words, if you follow the guidelines above, I have a hard time believing you’ll have a bad experience traveling – no doubt about that. The Couchsurfing community offers so much richness when traveling. My best experiences abroad have almost always involved my hosts and surfers.

So, if you’re a woman interesting in Couchsurfing – do it! Take the steps above, embrace your freedom and Couchsurf on!

Other Posts in This Series: